My ex-partner and I can’t reach an agreement following separation. What can I do now?

When separating couples are unable to agree on arrangements for their children or finances, it may be necessary for the matter to be referred to the court for resolution.

Since April 2014, anyone applying to the court for assistance in resolving disputes is required to attend a meeting known as a mediation information assessment meeting. This is the first step that must be taken before an application to the court can be issued.

What is mediation?

Mediation involves an independent third party, known as a mediator, meeting with you and your ex-partner to identify issues of dispute. Mediators are trained to help resolve these differences in an effort to avoid the matter going to court.

Family mediators will act impartially and avoid any conflict of interest. They are unable to offer either party any advice as their role is to facilitate discussion.

What is a mediation information assessment meeting?

The first meeting with a mediator is an information assessment meeting. This meeting is intended to establish whether mediation will be suitable in your circumstances and if it will help you and your ex-partner reach an agreement.

The mediator will speak to both parties about the process. This is voluntary and no one can be forced to engage. However, if both parties are willing to proceed in the process, a joint mediation appointment will be arranged for you and your ex-partner will meet with the mediator.

If you are uncomfortable being in the same room as your ex-partner, the mediator can arrange for you to speak with them separately.

 What is the cost of mediation?

The cost of mediation may vary depending on which mediator you instruct, the complexity of your case and how long it takes to reach resolution. Generally, the costs incurred in the mediation process are split between the parties.

What happens when we reach an agreement?

If matters can be resolved in mediation and an agreement is reached, the mediator will draw up the agreement in writing and both you and your ex-partner will sign the documentation. This will be a written record of what has been agreed in mediation.

However, it is worth noting that any agreement reached in mediation is not legally binding. For the agreement to have legal standing it will need to be referred to the court for a judge to review and approve.

Obtaining a legally binding order of the court will involve you incurring some additional cost, but it will provide you with certainty that the agreement reached is binding.

What happens if we don’t reach an agreement?

If an agreement isn’t reached through mediation a referral to court will be necessary. Details from mediation will not be disclosed or used in court as mediation is a confidential process. If it does become necessary to issue court proceedings you must ensure the mediator signs the prescribed court form to confirm your attendance at mediation.

Will I need legal advice during the mediation process?

Some people find it helpful to have access to legal advice during the mediation process. Solicitors may be able to assist by offering advice on legal matters connected with your mediation discussions. They can also offer advice on any agreement reached during mediation and, eventually, they can assist in obtaining a legally court order.

Rebecca Patience is a solicitor in Harrison Drury’s experienced team of family and divorce lawyers in Lancashire and Cumbria. If you would like to speak confidentially to Rebecca about any family law matter contact her on 01772 258 321.